020

Ten years, for God’s sake. For ten years Jon had been part of her life. Then why was June feeling so uncomfortably anxious before meeting Jon for a simple, harmless dinner where other people she’d known for a while were also invited?. She tried to keep those thoughts at bay as she stood in front of the coat hanger from which hung an apple green dress with spaghetti straps and which she pressed against her body at the level of her shoulders. She tried hard not to acknowledge that she was paying more attention to detail than other times, but as her eyes found their reflection in the mirror she did admit one thing to herself: she WAS looking forward to meet up with him again and catch up, Jon was probably one of the most charming people she’d ever met, and she felt glad that he considered her a friend as well, for once inviting her to an event where her brother and Jon’s publicist, John, wouldn’t be at.

However, June did feel slightly taken aback by the imminent socialization that would be involved: her recent relationship had developed and died of asphyxia in less than three months and she was seriously thinking about taking a break from dating and meeting new people, a decision that would also help her concentrate more in the book she was writing, inspired by her travels. It was the year 1996 for crying out loud, and people still looked at her as if there was something wrong with her for not having yet married or had children.

She looked at her lips: too red. She softly wiped the lipstick off and changed it for a soft pink lip gloss. Once satisfied, she took her purse, car keys and left. If everything ran as expected, she’d be arriving at Ciro’s at the same time as everyone else.  

…

Jon let out a sharp blow of air from his lungs and looked at himself in the mirror. He hadn’t cut his hair that short since his teens, and he still felt a little overexposed without his dense mane. He raked a hand through his short, soft strands and cringed in frustration at the sight of his receding hairline, but it wasn’t too bad. Not yet.

After the monstrous (but successful) tour was finally over it felt rather nice to have a normal life. At least for a while, until the bug started itching again. There was something that itched harder this time, though: he and Dorothea had decided to file for divorce as soon as the tour was over, but now that the moment had arrived, it just didn’t feel right. He’d had his share of fun these past few months, succumbing here and there to the charm of beautiful women. But none of them had satisfied him, so was he making a mistake by divorcing Dorothea? He had to admit that there wasn’t a woman he could trust more than her, she was a good mother and had been a good wife. Even when love was gone, the family they had was still there, and Jon had now mixed feelings about his decision. That’s why he’d been wearing his wedding band again lately.

“A day at a time” he whispered and pursed his lips in an attempt to switch his focus to that night’s dinner schedule. Then suddenly, as if calling his attention to another urgent matter, his crotch twitched in response to the image of June that popped into his head.

He chortled softly. Ten years, for God’s sake. For ten years he’d known her. Then why was Jon now feeling this urgency that like a bulldozer swiped any other matter that may be troubling him?. But first things first. He’d see how the night went and how things developed before making any decision. He had to be careful, though, really careful if he wanted to avoid creating a mess. He had to be perfectly sure that every one of his moves was right, or it could end up in disaster.

…

In the end, nothing ran as expected for June, and traffic seemed to be determined to make her late for the night’s appointment. It wasn’t a formal event, but June liked to keep things (specially punctuality) within the limits of the socially acceptable.

As she walked along the front windows of the restaurant, June scanned the inside through the glass in search of the unmistakable blonde mane and broad white smile, or the long, black tresses and also broad smile that usually accompanied the former. None to be seen.

It was only when she announced herself at the reception that she was led to the back of the building into an area by the open courtyard that had been apparently cleared out for the occasion. A couple of bodyguards stood in strategic points. As she approached she could hear the throaty laughter and teasing that usually preceded the group of people she was expecting to meet, and she thanked she had time to catch her breath before finally reaching them. She was also glad that she wasn’t the only late one, and that dinner hadn’t been served yet.

She took a quick look around the table when she said hello and excused herself for the delay, hoping that no one had noticed she’d held her breath when she’d laid eyes on Jon. His new look of shorter and darker hair made the color of his eyes incredibly bright, and together with his impeccable physical shape and casual but simple and elegant clothes, made him look like probably the most beautiful man June remembered to have landed eyes on. As she sat she discretely zoomed into his earlobes and noticed the two holes in the left one, moving then on to his chiseled jaw, where (even when freshly shaved), his prominent beard was always making itself noticed.

In the search of her observations being unnoticed, June failed to detect a similar reaction she’d triggered in Jon, who despite the fact that he had some sort of suspicion of where his intentions where going, suddenly couldn’t help but smirk wryly when he imagined June naked for the first time, image that was effortlessly helped by the dress that wrapped her body just tightly enough to bring out the shapeliness of her hips. He couldn’t help but wonder what noise the fabric would make when it was being torn off her body.

When the examination ended on both parts, their eyes met, and Jon’s smirk disappeared. He felt the spark, that spark that once you feel it, it’s hard to forget, most of all because of its scarcity: the spark of magic. June, instead, noticing the change in his attitude, felt exposed, but smiled nonetheless. Jon tried to recover just in time to draw a lazy sideways smile.

June quickly looked away.

“Mmm…Death in Venice”, she reached for the book that was placed on the lap of Tommy, one of the sound engineers she recognized from seeing before backstage, hoping the rosy flush was receding from her cheeks. “Reminds me I need to give it another read”. She took a quick sidelong glance at the rest of the characters present at the table: another writer, a young actress, a film director, and of course, Richie. They were having the usual discussions.

“You concentrate on writing yours which are just fine”, Tommy replied. “I loved your last character, Darin. Man, she’s opinionated!”

“I’m glad you like it…I was sort of worried it would come out as negative, but in the end not even I could control her!”

Tommy laughed amusedly. “No, she’s cool, she just needed to find her voice. I like it how when she finally does, she’s completely free”.

“A happy ending, huh? So everyone gets laid in the end then”, commented Richie in his usually sleazy tone.

“Typical Sambora”, added Jon with a mock embarrassment that resembles that of a mother when their child says something inappropriate in front of other people. “I don’t think anybody’s interested in the sex life of the character, those of us who HAVE read the story are fine with things just the way they are”.

“Why? Apparently SOMEONE is interested” June said defiantly but carefully adding enough tease to her voice in order not to spoil the jolly atmosphere. “I think it’s much more fun to talk about sex than literary prizes, exhibitions or the latest film, don’t you think? Maybe I should move on to writing erotica, who knows”. She bit her lower lip.

Even when the question was directed at him, everybody else agreed. Jon smiled sexily and leaned back against the chair, raising his hands up in surrender.

June grinned and laughed, relieved by Jon’s playful disposition. As the conversation derived in spicy topics, she couldn’t help but notice how his sparkling blue eyes slid unabashedly downward to her cleavage. She felt a flush of warmth at his attention, but a fleet of waiters led by the chef arrived with the dishes. The heavy accented Italian chef introduced the first course dishes to the crowd and took his bow after wishing them a good meal. 

June noticed that there was still one empty chair, and she was about to ask when she saw how a pair of blood-red-nailed hands slid over Jon’s shoulders. He turned his head round abruptly and looked up to see the woman standing behind him. She was wearing a long sundress that showed off her firm, round bosom and she seemed to be either a model or an actress. She was statuesque.

“Everybody knows my friend Elise, right?”, Jon clarified hastily as he stood up. She kissed him in both cheeks and took her seat on the table as she received everyone’s greetings and smiled back. Jon also smiled. The big smile. The movie-star smile. It was only those fleeting moments that reminded June of who Jon really was. He became the hyper-real, super-alive celebrity in front of her eyes, the one you usually see on screens and photos. Only in three dimensions. The realization gave her a queasy feeling. Feeling that disappeared as he went back to being just…Jon.

As they enjoyed their delicious meals, Jon couldn’t help but notice that June hadn’t ignored the glass of white wine that had been placed in front of her, together with the sparkling water one, but she seemed engaged in a conversation with the people on her half of the table, opposite from Jon so he decided he would inquire later.  He also noticed that she seemed slightly in distress, but she kept smiling anyway. That was one thing he had always appreciated about her, June was the girl who never stopped smiling.

“I think that a breakup after 25 MUST have something to do with marriage, or the lack of desire to have one. Don’t you WANT to get married?” Elise inquired.

“I don’t know”, replied June tiredly. Jon smiled secretly, wondering how long it would take to build June up until she launched into one of her monologues. According to his experience and the topic that was being discussed: not much longer. “Nowadays people look at marriage differently”, she added.

“Then let’s not talk about marriage, let’s say family. Don’t you want a family?”

June remained silent for a while. “I already have one”, she finally said without further explanation and nodding slowly. Jon observed her eyes, wide-set, tear-shaped, and green, that registered the slightest change in mood. Then her hair, her jaw, her teeth, her lips, her slender fingers and body that followed the contour of her chair. He waited, but the outburst never came. June was calm and serene as a rock caressed by a fresh stream of water. Jon couldn’t make up his mind about whether he preferred her calm and serene, or fiery and unstoppable. Or maybe both.

Noticing June’s reluctance for further discussion of the topic, Elise retreated and the discussion derived to less personal issues.

Evening was coming on and the air around the table was warm and smoky.

“Sometimes I envy you guys writers”, Jon began, “Between you two there’s probably more people that’ve read your books than bought my records, yet your lives are much more peaceful than mine”. He reflected, as usual when it came to his moment of modesty which held the purpose of filling gaps in a transitional moment of a conversation. It was always a neutral moment that would level the ground for another topic to arise.

“As Hemingway said in his Nobel acceptance speech”, Julian, the other writer, said with a certain air of solemnity. “Writing at its best…is a lonely life”.

“Cheers to that” June raised her glass of wine and clinked it against Julian’s after he raised his own.  The rest of the guests joined.

“And meanwhile, I’ll just be like this,” Jon said jokingly, putting his head down on the table, hiding in the crook of his arm. There was a joking element to the description, but he was being serious as well. When he picked his head up again June once more silenced a gasp. He couldn’t escape his looks any more than he could escape the attention of his fans. In her mind, June couldn’t find another way of putting it: he was simply beautiful.

But such superlatives were probably just the kind of thing that would make him cringe, she also thought as, once again, Jon ran his hands through his thick brown hair until it stood on end. He’d been chain-smoking practically throughout the whole dinner and had barely picked at his food, drinking insane amounts of coffee and water instead. For the first time since she’d met him, June sensed that Jon was nervous.

After the table was cleared of dishes, the guests moved to another area of the VIP zone that was furnished with different sofas, armchairs and puff seats. Wine, coffee and water kept being poured into the glasses and smoky snakes kept floating in the space. June and Jon unconsciously began to gravitate towards each other and at one moment they realized they had been left alone, caught up in their own conversation. Jon moved for June to take a seat at one of the velvety sofas. They both sat on their sides, mirroring each other, with one arm on the back of the sofa.

Their conversation gradually turned playful and June blamed the wine on her perception of a certain flirtatious banter among them. She kept looking at his wedding band, and felt Elise’s regular piercing glances from a spot not far away from where they were.

“You know what?” Jon said at one point. “It’s inexcusable that having cell phones come into existence we still rely on telephones to communicate, and if I’m not mistaken…”he said briefly getting up and retrieving his cell phone from on top of the coffee table by the sofa, “…I still don’t have your number…of the shoes you wear, I mean”, he flashed a smile biting his tongue, evidencing his joke. 

June laughed and shook her head as she searched for her cell phone inside her handbag, repeating to herself that asking for another person’s number was perfectly normal gesture. The feeling of normality quickly vanished when she felt Jon’s hand drop lightly onto her bare knee and give it a squeeze. It was a good thing she didn’t know how hard Jon wanted to slid that hand all the way up her delicate thigh.

As soon as they finished exchanging numbers, Jon’s cell phone rang in his hand. He looked at the display and frowned, then excused himself and stood up. June tried to ignore his conversation but couldn’t find a way of getting up: she was somehow stuck to that sofa. If she got up she would get caught up in another conversation, but she needed to make sense of the situation she was in first. She couldn’t hear what Jon was saying, but she noticed that his tone was firm and dismissive.

Then all of a sudden June stood up and stepped into the garden, where she took a lungful of fresh air. She was trembling and couldn’t tell if drunk or aroused, but yes, it must definitely be the wine. She reminded herself why she tried to avoid it: it changed her perception of reality, like right at this moment, and who knows what else she’d have done if that phone hadn’t rang. Jon’s touch on her knee still burnt.

When Jon finally came back, June had decided that it was time to leave that place before she did something really stupid. Jon, in turn, fought against admitting that he was upset by his wife calling him in the middle of the conversation he was having with June, but she tried to put those thoughts aside with the purpose of resuming the mood of the interrupted conversation. He moved behind her and placed his hands on her shoulders, the thumb slightly rubbing against the base of her neck. June turned around abruptly and her expression might as well have been the mere face of the Great Wall of China.

“I have to go, Jon, thank you for the invitation”

Jon cursed himself, he’d gone too far. The only thing that was left was the hope that the damage wasn’t irreparable. A rather conservative attitude seemed like the best option.

“Sure”, he spoke mechanically. He couldn’t find any other words to say, and neither did June. He didn’t realize that his confusion was being evidenced by the furrow on his brow, which was immediately picked by June. Mistakenly, she thought maybe she’d gone too far. 

She leaned over to give him a kiss on the cheek and felt his lips on a spot near her ear. “Thanks for coming”, he spoke against her skin, and his warm breath sent a flush through her body. He didn’t look for her green eyes. If he did, she would know.

So without even daring to look into his aquamarine eyes, June ran back into the building, hastily voicing a general goodbye as she made her way out of the restaurant.